Recap of Beer Pong Tournament

I know of few of my fans out there have been asking me, "hey Ben! How'd Sudan do at the world cup of beer pong?". Well I'll tell you. First off, our costumes were me with a pillowcase (tightened with a headband) over my head to represent a turban and really tight clothes to represent starving children. Julie wore a shirt that said, "Stop genocide in Sudan" and that's it. Now that's what I call being a Debbie downer. Ahh just kidding Julie. We also taped a piece of paper to our back with our motto: "Finish your beer because somewhere in Sudan there is a staving child being forced into a terrorist rebel army." There was no way we could loose. Sadly, we found out that there were skills that people could have for beer pong that Julie and I just didn't have.

There were 20 teams/countries and only 5 tables. We got a round 1 bye, so we ended up going to Jack in the Box with Jake Ellis and his partner Josh Shiffman (some hotshot Beer Pong brother from AEpi. They were also our first opponent (Israel) for round 2, so we weren't worried about missing the game. They ended up winning the flip (we flipped discs to see who would go first) and they came out knocking out 4 of our cups. When it was finally our turn, I think we both missed our first shots. In the end I don't think Julie made a single cup. Lol julie. She also had trouble finishing her beers, so I had to drink them.

I also had a full cup of beer during round 1 because I was anxious to start drinking since the last time I had beer was in Chico CHUG 4 weeks earlier.

After losing to Jake and Josh, I'm pretty sure we had another bye. During this time, I think julie had a beer in her hand, and she was complaining about how she had such a hard time drinking it. So I took it out of her hand, and kindly demonstrated how to chug a full cup of beer. Oh man she was so impressed! Lol.

Our next game was against Will Long and Jed from the B team. I forget their country but it was the country with the highest amount of AIDS. We lost the flip again, and again they came out really strong and knocked out 3 or 4 of our cups. Then on our turns, we would get one every now and then. They beat us really quickly and Julies beers that she had to drink kept on adding up. I tried to show her how to focus and stabilize her chi, but by doing this, I ended up finishing most of her beer. And she still couldn't finish her cup... so I did.

We had played 2 games out of our 4 for pool play, and I was already ridiculously drunk out of my mind. I tried to dance a little bit, but since it was a beer pong tournament, there wasn't really a dance floor; they just had speakers blasting ska music. I also hung out with some smokers outside, but I told them I didn't smoke which I'm proud of myself for. I mean, even when my inhibitions are out of the window, I still know that smoking pot and fucking retarded. Apparently Julie wasn't feeling too great, and she went home. After telling me this, I thought it about how I would have to play the next two games alone, and how that seemed like it would be ok to me. So I told her I was fine if she wanted to walk home, but I was going to stay. Thirty seconds after she left, I walked around outside to the back of the house and threw up in the bushes. Yikes I know! It was only 9:30 and I was throwing up already (games started at 6). I went in the basement to relax on the couches.

Just my luck though, because my third game against Dijibuti was in the basement. This girl on the woman's ultimate team named Brynne that I didn't know before said that she would be on my team. I told her that I had already thrown up and she was going to have to drink most of the beer cups. Good thing that Dijibuti didn't beat us AS BAD as the two teams I played before me. I was 0-3 at that point. That's when I began to start feeling really bad.

I went up to Tommy's room and almost passed out on his chair. I remember someone coming up to me and telling me to take off my shoes so people wouldn't write on me. So I took off my shoes, but then I thought it would be funny if people wrote on me, so I tried to put my shoes back on. I couldn't even do that though, which made me kind of frustrated :(. Brynne was there trying to help me out, and we went outside. I guess something about being outside drunk with a girl makes me want to take my clothes off. I remember Brynne saying something like, "Although you have a good body, I can't be out here with you if your going to take your clothes off". She was being really helpful to me, and I didn't want her to leave so I put my clothes back on. It didn't make any sense to me afterward because I looked on her facebook and it said she was single.

Back inside I said I had to use the bathroom, which inevitably lead to me throwing up again. This time Brynne was right next to me watching which was lame. She didn't seem too disgusted which was nice. That was alot better than the one time I threw up in front of Alexis at her party in Pleasanton, then she didn't talk to me the rest of the year.

After throwing up twice, I felt like I deserved to start feeling good again, but my stomach felt like it was on fire. I've never heard of any other cases where people's stomachs were on fire. Will Bower said it was probably my stomach acid. It still hurt like a bitch. Like, it hurt to walk or even open my eyes. I kinda just sat crunched in a ball in Tommy's chair when Rawb came up and gave me some granola bar. Then I began telling people I was going to walk home, but Robby Merk gave me 2 bucks and called Tipsy Taxi for me. What a nice guy. It's time's like that where you realize people actually care about you.

I ended up going home to lay on my bed and the fire in my stomach didn't stop hurting until about 1 o'clock in the morning. I also had to forfeit my last game. Overall it was a fun night. I think I ended up pee'ing 7 or 8 times outsid of Taylor and Tommy's house in the front bushes. And I went 0-4 in the tournament. That's alright I guess because it was only my second time playing beer pong. Moral of the story is to not get anxious and drink a beer, or drink extra beer to show off if your in a beer pong tournament where you are playing at least 4 games already. Take it slow and let the beer come to you. Also another moral of the story: don't pick girls to be beer pong partners. Lol Julie.